Note: This was originally posted 8 years ago, in my old blog threelittlekhatibs. Putting it here, as I decided to organize all my blogs under one domain now.
How’s everyone doing these days? I hope all of you are on the brighter side of your battle. I know we can not be on the top of our game, all the time. But I pray you would hang in there when time’s rough, remembering all the struggles you pulled through and gained strength from.
On the side note.. I just need to drop off here and send a shout out to all you beautiful souls who have been sending your best wishes all the way to us here. By God’s grace, we are now 18 weeks pregnant!
God is good, indeed.
Beside all the usual knacks on my body due-to additional inhabitant growing in there, life has been such a bliss for me and hubby these 4 months.
It’s beyond words when I cried that day with home pregnancy test in my hand, calling my husband who was in office, and thought something was wrong due to me sobbing non stop before I managed to utter some words to him.
When we first heard our baby’s heart beat and his form on the sonogram monitor. When my husband squeezed my hands, boosting proud on his baby’s loud heart beat; life just seems too wildly beautiful to handle.
Though aside from all the joys and the overwhelming warmth, knowing that we’re pregnant means lots more responsibilities now that I am having a living human inside of me. Who solely relies on what and how I eat and take care of my body.
I swear I had all those plans of what to do when the time come should I find my self pregnant; what to eat and what to do at different times of the day. But getting pregnant when your body is at its low point, is another challenge all by itself.
I drawn myself into so many, many literature on what to do or not when you’re pregnant, that they start giving me panic attacks every other day.
Some times I eat or do something wrong that I don’t even know is forbidden (most are based on parents’ advise, which is A LOT!), or some other times, I just totally forget.. and get reminded when pain starts to emerge down there, and I am all cold sweat thinking of what have I done to my baby.
Paranoia is really not helping during this period, as you can see. Sadly, given my medical history.. I tend to slip into it more often than I should have.
Having parents who remind you on and on about how fragile my body is, also not contribute to the calming down process, I should tell you.
Although I am grateful for having so many people who love me and are deeply concerned about my baby, sometime it doesn’t help when it comes to my conquest for a bit of self confidence to being a good mother for this kid growing inside me.
Okay, enough with my excessive whining.
This is the greatest bless of my life so far. Having to share it with the man who loves me like my hubby does, is simply a wonderful ride I will cherish until the day we hold that beautiful little one in our hands.
I guess, at the end of the day, just like everything else in life I just need to devote my very best effort and intention on the quest, adjusting to this new phase of my life.
So that’s my whole rambling on the newest joy in my life. Another way of saying I am thrilled and scared at the same time. But you probably know that already… 🙂
Thanks for reading though! For all you kind people who have been sticking up with me. Hope to see you all soon enough!